As the story has it, I woke up and found myself on the very opposite side of the globe – the flipside. I arrived February 16th, 2005 and thought I’d simply do a year, then leave. Years later and I’m still here. I went from being some random foreign girl to taking on labels I never imagined – university professor, film extra, professional boxer, group leader for my own girls-only fitness company, Flipside Fitness. And now I run my own boxing club, Korea's largest -- Hulk's Club!!!
Life on the flipside is nothing like I ever thought it would be…!!!
Wednesday, October 26, 2016
Today I agreed to manage the gym for a few unscheduled hours.
Today I punched a dude.
Today I indulged in chocolate birthday.
Today I really “embraced the suck”.
As soon as I saw Korea calling me in the morning my energy levels went sublevel and my hopes and aspirations for a successful, jam-packed day just nose dived. Energy is contagious, both good and bad energy, and today I caught an extra whiff of bad energy and it sent everything spiralling.
I have to get to Korea.
I feel like I’m sitting on a fence, Korea is on one side and Canada is on the other, and no sooner do I lean to be fully on one side but the other side pulls on me and stops me. I need to pick a side; I need to get on a side, so that I can fully live my life.
People have no idea what it means for me to have lived in Korea for 11 years, establish a life there, get married and make my dream come true with starting up my own business, and then just get up and leave it. You can never fully leave it but I feel like I’ve made a decision about it, Korea just isn’t agreeing to my decision. Korea isn’t letting me go.
I have to get to Korea so that I can live my life.
It’s been over a year since I first touched down here in Toronto, Canada and every single day I struggle with moving forward and putting Korea in my past. Today’s phone conversation only restated this fact. The struggle is real. The struggle is most definitely real. And I know it’s real because the bad energy of that one phone conversation seeped into the rest of my day and I was totally off in everything I did.
I punched a man.
Perhaps I wouldn’t have done that if I had hadn’t that phone call and hadn’t been so eaten up inside over my struggle, I don’t know. He had come walking into my female-only gym and I told him he had to leave because it was a female-only facility. He thought it funny to pretend to be overly curious and try peeking over the small divider at the front. I repeated to him that he had to leave and when he didn’t leave I got up and physically tried to escort him out. He ended up elbowing me in the boob so I punched him in the shoulder as a means of letting him know I’m serious and I’ll get more serious if I have to. I then wrapped my arms around him, trapping his arms by his side, and jerked him towards the door. He then left.
My boss returned some time later and instantly I confessed to him, “I punched some dude so do I have to fill out an incident form because I will”. He told me I didn’t have to and then asked for the details of the situation. I got mad props from those training who saw the whole ordeal go down but I was still “embracing the suck” from the morning phone conversation so I wasn’t in the mood to “celebrate”.
“Embrace the suck”, I was told tonight, “but know that tomorrow you can’t. Tomorrow’s a new day”.
Tuesday, October 25, 2016
The climb up the CN Tower consists of 1,176 stairs and a whole lot of heart and determination to take each step. Lightening has the heart and determination but she was lacking in confidence.
I talked to her on Saturday, the day before her climb, as I massaged her calves after training, and she voiced her doubt. “The body can achieve what the mind believes”, I told her. This is seriously becoming one of my favourite affirmations, it’s right after “better than yesterday”, because it’s so true. She was so worried that she wouldn’t be able to complete it and everyone at the gym has been aware of her self doubt. This past week we had members add a personal little motivational blurb on a paper we had typed up for her; we knew that’d totally lift her spirits and show her we all believe she can do it. We chatted for awhile about her hesitation over participating so I tried to reassure her that she could do it and I offered various tips. I told her to not step on the edge of the stair but put her full foot onto it and not walk up on her toes. Pace herself, enjoy it and know that she can either remember this day as being the day she really challenged herself or the day she gave up. “Which are you going to do?”, I asked her, “challenge yourself or give up?” She said “challenge”.
She did it. She did the climb and so she most definitely challenged herself. And not only did she do it but she killer her expected time and beat the participant average.
She called me when I was at the gym to tell me her fantastic news. I was so proud of her.
Monday, October 24, 2016
- Personal training licensing course
- Remaining due courses for my boxing coach license
- Getting my police record background check (for coaching license)
- Setting up a possible next fight overseas
- Figuring out where I’ll be living once the lease is up at my apartment
- Planning a club Christmas party
- Getting my G1 license
- Setting up when to take the CPR/First Aid course
Sunday, October 23, 2016
Tonight changed everything; he changed everything. A day can change your life.
Saturday, October 22, 2016
Friday, October 21, 2016
Thursday, October 20, 2016
I said it to Butter -- "You exhaust me".
A lot of people seem to exhausting me today -- Butter, the anticipation of this man at my club, the Golden Nugget, Foo Man Choo, Plan B, and even the Nigerian Doctor.
Me allowing myself to be distracted, me dividing my attention, time and effort for them. And there it was, the realization that it really had nothing to do with them but in fact it was all me. Me trying to care, me trying to juggle all that I'm trying to take on and conquer, and me trying to work at "Korean speed" in Canada and getting frustrated that it's not panning out as I want it to or as fast. I needed a break tonight. I was feeling rather mentally spent and feeling mentally drained meant I couldn't push myself physically. I just wanted to recharge. So that's what I did.
Called off tonight's boxing and weight training, then texted the Captain and told him "Let's go get ice cream, my treat".
Ice cream out with a dear friend was exactly what I needed.
Came home feeling super refreshed and then ended up getting into quite the lengthy phone conversation on the phone with someone I have never met before, someone who up until yesterday I didn't know exist. Perhaps it was the break I needed, the overdose of sugar from the ice cream and sweetness from my friend that abled me to stay until to the wee hours of the day, I don't know, but that mental break worked wonders.